Tell me again, why do I need one of these things?

Very impressed with the Olympics.

I got seized and dragged away by the idea that I can make a birth sampler fast-ish. New cousin, hopefully. Things are little hinky, so fingers crossed.

Uh, that's about it. I need to get on and do something useful.

*realization*

Maybe bbd will let me work down here.

Hi, this is just a little thing petronelle recced over her journal.

Do the names McGuire, Giffen and DeMatteis make you drool?

Do they compel you to eat Oreos?

Do they make you think of Guy Gardener, all round nice guy?

And do they make you desperate to cry that Maxwell Lord's only bad point was to be a capitalist jerk with an ego the size of Moscow*?

...okay...

how does gloriously authentic (in a good way) fanart sound?

how does glorious fanart sound with a note-on script sound?

kokiri85 has drawn Superboy applying for a job


*for some reason, the brane is refusing to pronounce Moscow properly. Uh, that's Mos-cowwwwwww. I blame Cities of the Underworld.

Greetings to the fangirl army now encamped in Toronto! I hope all you CanCon / RCW / HCL Tribute Night people are having a whale of a time. And I want to hear how the Hard Core Logo gig went last night!

To people who aren't in Toronto also get a big dose of my love ♥ ♥ ♥

My brane keeps on killing me. I need to introduce it to the concept that it is meant to kill somebody else. So yesterday was really really boring. Did nothing except vegitate and watch the Pixar Shorts dvd I picked up at the library (my cover story: the_dosk will like it*), which was great and the stuff was way earlier than you/I could guess from seeing it. Also, that sort of extra adjustable desk light, the brand name is Luxo, what would you americadians call one?

(I ask all the big questions)

Mummyfrog wanted to know if I have ever considered yoga. (Uh, no, I stand on one foot, I fall over.) And the brane decided to eat two chocolate chip cookies (from Markses, 110 calories each), but, thankfully, I can take that as a momentary indulgence. I still seem to be loosing weight. This is good. Though I worry about going too thin to fit into any of my decent skirts. Looked at my "archived" skirts and decided that 9 out of 10 were completely vile. And one dress made me look like a drag artiste. So if you know a very short drag artiste, let me know. Maybe Gloria will know one.

Also, I am very excited re: new Hellboy movie. I just need it to show somewhere near here. (Unlikely)


* For those unfamiliar with the concept, the_dosk finds himself assumed as my twin (or the other way round) even by people who have only met one of us. the_dosk is a god of CGI wizardry and makes his own virtual daleks accurate to something crazy like 1/16 of an inch. Oh, and he liked the Pixar video very much and offered intelligent commentary thereon.

More working natter than anything else.

I had some of the basics for Stella in the WIP.
* She had met Ray at a charity benefit her mother was running
* Her mother was English and probably a débutante circa 1958 or earlier (so, Stella was somewhat unexpected and she's an only child, so we might assume some kind of 'problem' (besides being completely unsuited?!))
* Her mother wanted to set her up with Orsini

Then everything suddenly slotted into place.
* Stella's father came from an impossibly rich family with a taste for benefactoring (or whatever the abstract of being a benefactor is) in the a vaugely Getty way
* the marriage worked on the basis that her parents avoided each other
* her mother believed in a good marriage etc etc (a nice little mansion with a picket fence)
* her father believed in Stella doing what she wanted to do with her life
* her father loved astronomy (which is a theme, really) and despite lurking still made a lot more impression than her mother...
* I read something about the last debs a while back and rich Americans were still considered very good prospects...

Hello!

Still alive, even after Brane's efforts.


Cuckoo quotient down. (Yes, it makes very little sense. Sorry)

I am having a burst of creativity on the writing front. I just need to check some factoids (which does not mean "small facts" as "facts liable to be untrue") because Chuck Palahnuik does not count as a reliable body of facts.

So. Wikipedia, I think! :-P

SO. Tell me, what have I missed? Have all the fangirls gone on their scheduled migration?

I'm sure I had more important things to say.

(Uh, like, trying to find out which dS fic had a Ray of uncertain provenance finding out that the other Ray or perhaps his former self was the go-to-guy for queers with - uh - problems)

Yesterday was made of headache.

Today was the day of the Brain Doctor. (He saw "Brain Doctor" in my diary and thought it was sweet and funny).

The short plan is to bring up Med 2 to the dose he wants, wait a few months for effect, and then cut down and then eliminate Med 1, because we are still not sure it ever worked and I have been on for forevercakes.

It sounds incredibly straightforward but (you realise these things once you get out) it's very long term (which might be medical neccessity, but, uh, doesn't win massively on the buzzy-wants-a-life stakes).

Otherwise went to Skoob and bought "Moorcock's Book of Martyrs".

Then went to nice Chinese (marchmont street, if you need a Chinese in Bloomsbury) and ate some very nice and reasonably priced food. And talked Mike Moorcock with bbd (who wins, as usual, and is slightly taken aback by price of second hand 70s Moorcocks).

Still working on the Joe Dick thing, turning commentfic into proper fic and unbundling everything. Hell, I have 2k words to show already and I am only half-way through. Then I'll get a victim and have it marked for disturbedness.

Current favourite bit:

Billy can make people love him, even when Joe figures his mother was the only sperm bank in Bon Accord, Alberta. That’s how much of a bastard Billy really is and everyone loves him, he just has this thing. Joe would love to know the how and why but whether it is to make him stop or force Billy to finish what he started Joe just doesn’t know.

Headache still keeping a low profile. I think it's nervous about the brane doctor, but it could be the extra meds I should have been on in March, if they didn't lose the letter saying so for four months. *growls*

Uh, that's about it. Sent in for another job. Done washing.

Cities of the Underworld in Japan! Bbd finds the best buzzy programming.

If you don't know yet, I have a thing for bunkers.

How much would you pay for a National Geographic in Canadian dollars in 1997?

Now, it's past my bed time. Joe Dick thing polishing nicely.

Hopefully more tomorrow.

What has the world come to, I seem to be being attacked by my furry toy manta ray, Hugh, the_dosk says I am fortunate since Hugh has no mouth.

the_doskWhy is he called Hugh? *thinks* Oh god, Hugh-Ray.

(still working on "why you should employ me..." with no honest answers*)

Never Did Find My Way Back by groaty
HCL, NC-17 Joe/Billy

I'm still short of a recommendation that isn't *waves hands excitedly*, so, What I Said

Oh God! Great characterisation and fantastic atmosphere. I could see Billy right there and you have everything that the camera loves about Billy and what a beautiful bastard he is. I don't quote have the words to express it. Almost a religious experience.

*Other people have no trouble doing this, I do. I like [blanks] as workplaces, I can do [blank] really well and you should pay me money to [blank] it.

I still have the answer that got me the [blank] interview of infamy (no resources with which to [blank] with and bloody minded attitude of [management types] who refuse to acknowledge importance of [blank] or that [blank] will get them in the ass and that I considered sending them mutilated objects of [blank] to demonstrate their stupid self-defeating attitude and that are screwing over the [individuals] who are the [end users] of this pile of crap.

/catharsis

(Ooh... Won't Wait Again, you sound like such a sensitive teenage delinquent cowboy, Hugh)

*emerges from huge pile of job applications*

(which, frustratingly, is not as bad as the headache this weekend)

Quick post about On the Inside.

"Inner Songs"

Mark's song is sung semi-coherently to Hockey Night in Canada.

(that is Mark Smithbauer, Fraser's squeeze and top ranking hockey player, for reasons not to be explored at this juncture, the Smithbauers stayed in the frozen north. It is a pretty amazing reason. And I love it. Only no writing lately and I really need to catch up on the Stella/Vecchio material... *rattles on*)

Not sure when this thing developed a soundtrack, possibly when I started heading chapters, but it was fundamentally musical before that.

Tonight there are no stars - headstones

Also; get me a Numb3rs fan and ask Charlie's mother's name and what the music she wrote that turned up in (assumedly infinite) basement was called.

Had many great things to show and tell, now can't remember them. Headaches frustrating and "the snowflakes are stopping my thoughts" (or "possibly milkfloats rob [my] mind..."). It's just limitating and stops me from having a good time / writing. And when I feel vaguely decent I most often am nackered, which is stupid because there is so much stuff out there and I just can't get to it.

Posting in this vein will not help filling in "why you should employ me!" section. Signing off.

Dear Brane,

I was meant to get on with sensible stuff today, with a bit of time to write unsensible stuff like Ray V and Stella almost getting it on.

Instead, I get triptans and a 8-9 headache on the ouch scale.

I would like to point out that humans do not hibernate and that the ceilings should not flash on and off.

Also, this time next week you are going to visit the branedoctor.

No love, buzzy

So, del.icio.us is going to do a mass logout, so they ask you to check you have your password.

For reasons not to be explored at this juncture, I was no longer sure of mine.

So I reset it.

Now, when I try and log in, I get a Yahoo "you have no permission" screen.

*kicks yahoo*

(for those who don't know, my del.icio.us account is what I use to track my fandom research links. some of them are useless to anyone but me, others are nifty)

ETA: I hope this hasn't done something to my regular Yahoo password. *goes check*

In! I think I just changed the password on the moment of the eclipse or something like that! Now to check out what my stuff looks like now.

Every time I blog lately, it has been about my headaches. Last week was the worst for a long time. Then there's this week.

Yesterday, I got a headache that scored nine on the Richter scale. And spent the day mostly asleep on the couch.

(the only good thing about yesterday was talking to the ever-incredible papajoemambo for a couple of hours. Telephones are awesome, Joe is the awesomest!)

Today was not much better, maybe an eight and everything is too loud, too bright, too everything.

So, no playing with archaeologists today. But the Doctor says I've lost 5 pounds! \o/ Just need to keep going. It might not be as fast as some diets, but I am changing my eating habits etc not just restricting things. Also, porridge rocks.

Something of less rock. Got letter from brane doctor yesterday. It suggested new drug regieme and some etc. Okay, this letter came in the post less than two weeks before my appointment (which is hopefully not going to get cancelled again). And it came yesterday. Which is strange since the letter is dated in March. How can you lose a letter for four months?

Anywhichways, not really up and about internets-wise, even if I just had a little hello to my f-list. So, please tell me if anything cool is happening out there in the world of fandom.

Also; can I just reiterate, recs make me happy

It's getting stupidly hot here. Oh, and it's flying ant season. Yay!

I could go on about headaches again, starting with my unadventuruous course when I have one and my knackered apathy when I don't. On the Inside needs doing. I know it's kind of scary, but when it was rolling, it was fine. I just need to find... I don't know... a lot of things starting with more Stella/Vecchio.

And my head hurts.

My restarted headache diary has lasted for four days.

Hopefully, the weight-loss thing has done better. Doctor's Tuesday.

Stitching, however, is looking very good. Must shanghai the_dosk into taking photograph. Also need photograph of dosk's present.

Now I'm too hot and my head hurts!

Just as I was wondering what to do for the next 2 and a 1/2 hours before bed and still trying to find some enthusiasm.

Brane will continue shortly on the topic of things buzzy should have done once she had the chance...

Brane is very annoying like that. Somewhat like an unwanted guest, but this way, I can't storm out and go and hide in TA's room. (Uh, that's Tame American and is what EQ called "the mad turnip story")

God, when did the hot just go woomph on me?

Uh, last night wanting something to stitch to, I chanced upon some CSI (which I'd given up on since season seven... partly due to the ickiest and most implausible romance I have seen outside Canadian cinema. Inside Canadian cinema it is too dark to read, or something like that. To tell the truth, Buried on Sunday, even if Paul Gross is hot in it) and got myself "Slaves of Vegas" which was a reminder of when the show was, say, good and not gratuitious character whumping (say, Catherine's really bad day and the way it fucks with space-time to an annoying degree).

Okay, I should stop ranting about reasons it went wrong and...

...talk about how I really enjoyed "slaves of vegas", which was fun, had some nifty bits, and well, was generally good. And had Lady Heather, how many times has she treated Gil to tea? What I really like was Greg being a wonderfully kinky bastard with a touch of ingenue. If somebody could poke me in the direction of some lovely kinky Gil/Greg the world would be a shinier place (hopefully)

Finally, a nearly decent day.

Computing for the Inept was improved by some actual Inept (even if their problems were not terribly inept at all). Finally finished Eyre Affair and am nearly at the end of Never the Bride by Paul Magrs*. It is good silly fun and I want more of Robert the gay pixie.

Am seeing Doctor on Tuesday, am worried re: weight loss and everything else.

Am fixtating on chocolate here.

Feel I should be doing something re: On the Inside, but currently feel very tired.

That's one of those things; this week has been a distinctly bad patch and now I've finally come out from under the clouds and I am knackered. It's just as frustrating as not doing stuff because of head, if not even more so, because I can do, I just want to sleep a lot. (As if I haven't slept a lot all this week).

In short: :-(


*not one of his porntastic slashy ones, he has his other hat on in this one. So sadly Robert the gay pixie has not been molested by disembodied hands. The whole thing is pretty gen and pg13, but a lot of fun especially if you like Hammer Horror and the Avengers (or anything of that ilk).

If you cannot guess, I am having a crap week on the headache front, which has just left frustrating and is now heading to seriously meltdown (or wetdown, whatever it is when I start crying on bbd). The plan as of last Saturday was to apply for more jobs. So far the only things I have done are sleep, vegetate and stitch. The stitching is a form of self-hypnosis I'm sure, as as soon as I drop it the headache is waiting there to say hello like a hoodie in central not so central London (Stratford perhaps, there's a computer mart and the area gives me the heebie jeebies). Oh, and I went into "work" yesterday (boss away all week at "secret location") and all I wanted to do was get some stuff done so everything ran to schedule and boss stopped moaning about it. Boss phoned so I got an earful of boss interrogation on what can a database do besides produce shinier labels? /o\ Woe, woe, thrice times woe. Bbd is all for dropping in and reminding boss that I am a very shiny person who gets things done (even the really peculiar errands).

The universe owes me some serious karma, that or - as the_doskn points out - I have been an extremely bad person in a previous life.

I am not well endowed in the shoulder region, so this is my shoulders going down with the ship. I am not a happy bunny at this point and that is leaving out some areas of fail that I am not comfortable blogging without a lock, a really good one at that.

Still feeling incredibly rough on the brain front. Delicate, even.

As yesterday, I stuck it out early on (and visited my grandmother, who is doing better) but it came crashing in about 11 ish. Again.

Probably the same one as yesterday and no second dose of triptan in 24 hours. Fun.

I've got some stitching done and I definitely no longer have a sleep defecit (I think I've made it over 10hrs snoozing diurnally over two days).

Oh, and sam80853 sent me a moose postcard all the way from the "great but not white north". This is made of win and made my day much better.

Hello. I spent most of my day unconcious and full of triptans, which is so much lose.

The words; "Oh My Head!" can be used here in abundance.

Need to figure things out re: phoning papajoemambo and all my other cool peeps abroad.

There are also butterflies all over the Village and I can hear crickets but I can't find them.

I'm going to glare at my stitching now and find something not loud on the television. And lemonade. (Schweppes Lemonade is "the best thing about air travel" to me)

Not feeling too hot today.

Except in a sun-is-shining buzzy is wearing her lovely new dress and no bra kind of way. It is 70s and has big flowers on it. shadowkitty knows what my dress sense is like and is cowering in a bunker somewhere Luton-ish.

My boss isn't in this week, so I am officially not playing out with archaeologists this week, but am considering creeping in and finishing the database when he's not looking.

I got one of these in the post today: Stitchy Stitchy

Still working on my curent big stitching thing, though.

Also; saw some Ellis script for Astonishing (X-Men) which is just that good... I wants so damn much. Am now in a haze of comic book love. What is better than Beast singing and junior X-girls trying to pick a good name? Oh, and there's violence, so that might make things better or just more Ellis for words.

Dr Horrible is still wonderful, but clearly everyone on the street is sending emails with attachments of cat pictures. It is very stuttery. I assume the deadline is midnight USA time (or some timezone with a bit of America in it), it's just I have a lot to squish in today.

Am wearing new skirt. I might be looking fetching, but am annoyed to find out that as I have a really short trunk to match my seriously short everything else that I just look really bad with a shirt tucked into my big skirt, which tragic as that was the look the mental me can pull off istead of getting mental me's mother telling mental me that it really does not look like I have a waist at all and the mental mirror backing her up. :-(

I should have got on with the writtery stuff instead of getting all gussied up as now I am flatter than a flat thing instead of understanding Ray Vecchio and his feelings re: Stella and Irene and that Tony (his brother-in-law) bought him a Harley Davison cigarette lighter for Christmas.

What you get with my hiding out with last night's migraine.

I guess I need to spoiler cut for the end of HCL.

What if when Joe ( verb of spoileriness ), he is actually going to wake up in ( location of spoileriness ) And does it "reframe" the time travel sequence? Has Joe learnt it from Billy or is it a game gone wrong?

(I admit I wanted to do a "Slaughter House 5" on Billy for a while, it was just near impossible to execute.)

Hey, there you go five minutes of thought.

If I ever finish "On the Inside", the next putative project (aka the massively six degrees project) will feature Joe in the afterworld with Bob Fraser and Dexter Lexcanon*. He "wakes up" drowning in the waters of the Lethe. Cute, huh?


*he's from Buried on Sunday, The Paul Gross movie I was talking about a few footnotes around. He is a manipulative person playing a zero-sum game.