Tell me again, why do I need one of these things?

Smile And Wave

Smile And Wave

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
callum and hugh
Okay, currently not feeling very talky/eloquent today, so some comments might have to wait (sorry, meta people).

Worried that I may be backsliding/falling into old/previous role at "work". Considering that this encompasses most of the things that contributed to the great bust-up/ walk out, I feel like a slow motion traitor to myself as I go out and do ONL's "errands". It's not as if I like the way he asks even, there is always the assumption that I will just quietly do as asked (the stupid requests are back too) and the lack of p/qs. There is something about his manner and the way I'm drifting back into some sort of unassertive dream-space and I hate myself for it when I come home and land in planet ordinary. *wibble*

I have no idea if that made any sense to anyone, okay?

On the linksies front (I love the lj frontpage ticker) here:

for airfix and train devotees everywhere - hamburg miniature museum people who like complicated and fascinating things. For Simmers, it really puts our paltry world-building into perspective.

Very randomly, an american lady on the...

I am going to get back to this when I'm back on the buzzy!puter, bbd would rather like his back.

For insightful thinking on the new Who (and one of my favourite fandom people) I've got to do a responce to this:
http://janne-d.livejournal.com/108942.html
And catch up with the people on my previous Who meta post. Comments more interesting than the post (YMMV)
  • *hugs* is there actually anything you can do about the work situation? Sometimes I find when you force the other person to verbally or on paper acknowledge the extra things you do for them, they will show more appreciation for you rather than treat you like a servant.
  • Oh dear, that does sound like a tricky work situation. I don't remember the details of the bust up, but since you are referencing falling back into a previous role it sounds like things did get better for a while - what precipitated the change, and can you replicate it without a bust up?

    Do you have any kind of proper job description? Do you have the kind of relationship with ONL where you can ask for a quiet word and let him know you are unhappy with your situation and why? Or will it have to be something a bit mroe formal?

    Sadly, all the performance management stuff I have is from the manager's POV, but I suppose some of it is coud be useful for that kind of conversation... okay:
    1. write down what is bothering you and why, then leave it and go do something else for a while. When you come back to it, go through and re-write it with all the emotion taken out - you should get a good idea of what the real problems are that you need to bring up
    2. prepare what you need to say beforehand and talk through it with someone who isn't involved
    3. have specific instances of his behaviour to bring up (dates, details) i.e. take notes of things that he's asking that aren't acceptable and show that it isn't just a one-off
    4. make sure you talk about effects of his behaviour on you, NOT his personality (this is why you need the examples to refer to because then you aren't saying "you're always ungrateful/selfish whatever", you are saying "when you did x, that made me feel y" etc.)
    5. stay calm, stay polite - keep it as factual as you can, you might need to talk about how you feel about things but don't actually get emotional in the conversation (probably the hardest part)
Powered by LiveJournal.com