Uh, I'm still rewriting rather heavily, this time right over a lot of the stuff in the first release (greenonme's dsss present) and I think I have really improved the characterisation no end since then. Frannie is beginning to make a rounded appearance as Ray's tough opera-singer sister (with an interest in astrology... this being due South (albeit an AU) the results are totally accurate).
Most importantly; I found my het and now the romance between Vecchio and Stella is sparking hot.
The bad: I stopped for lunch (breakfast cereal) and now I can't wiggle back into my Frannie voice to finish the astrology stuff (I want to bulk up Turnbull the morning after the night before next) and interact with Ray and Stella.
The reason I was doing this at all is because I spent the whole thing jumping POVs and I want them to make more sense even if I am going to hop consciousnesses in some of the sex/interaction scenes, two is company, three points of view is too many.
Also, (this is actually good) I have the beginnings of a Ray V/Stella backstory and rational reasons for the whole astrology gig.
The ugly: Ouch. Hormones. Ouch. Also, the_dosk needs lots of hugs (tall people he can lean on need only to apply).