exc: oh dear!

(no subject)

If the buzzy!puter isn't dead then it is still extremely ill.

To add to the fun: it isn't just the buzzy!puter with brain ache.

Update: buzzy!puter stable enough to get data out for back up (nothing else guaranteed). My brain continues fried.
  • Current Mood
    sore sore
fraser: cartoon

I don't know if we still do this but...

They have called this day the eleventh of March. And whom-so-ever of you gets through this day unless you are shot in the head or somehow slain you will stand a hipnal when e'er you hear the name again and you will get excited at the name March the eleventh. We happy few, we few, we band of brothers our names will be as like household names. Those who are not here be they sleeping or doing something else, they will feel themselves - sort of crappy. Because they are not here to, to join the fight. On this day March the eleventh!

-- Leslie Nielsen as Buck Frobisher
transmetropolitan: suspicious spider

(no subject)

For some reason I am not entirely sure of, [does that need a comma?] I am still trying to write Bob's version of The Talk. Bob considers himself a quite modern parent and when compared to Fraser's grandmother certainly is. I also have a mental version of how he tries to convince his mother that masturbation is not a crime against nature etc but now recommended by physicians in order to [verb] the function of the [equipment?] mechanism and prevent blockages and such like of the [tubes] and ensure

Argh! I can't do Victorian!think this early in the morning.

Also, Turnbull works in Criminal Intelligence but has a special role in the new era of Forensic Computing with reference to the internet. [I'm sure I can fit that into Mountie!speak with some effort] --->
dief and donuts COYA

Booked for Murder

Regarding Booked for Murder [my attempt at writing fan fiction], things are beginning to become a little less weird. The plot is still rather odd [think Agatha Christie writing an episode of due South with some help form Paul Gross on acid] and the suspects are still strange [uh, why is there a ghost-spotter in the line-up?] and the clues are odd [why is fake maple syrup an important clue?] and canon-eccentricity is more than intact [why are they called the duck boys?].

Questions extrapolated from canon are addressed [who pays for the exploding car? do they recover costs from the arsonist? how popular is ray with motor pool?] and [why are there only three Mounties?].

Some Buzzy!think:

Turnbull is weird, kooky and under-endowed with people skills. Who the hell thought he'd make a good receptionist?

Turnbull identified himself as gay on the enlistment form, scored highly at Depot and good looking. Ideal material for an inclusive recruitment campaign which the RCMP really needed at the time [after the 'real world' Turbangate fiasco]

Cue posters [slogan: the hardest thing I ever did was come out as a Mountie] and magazine articles [which suggests that nobody in recruitment actually researched 'gay interest' magazines] and a small cult following and fan-mail [some of which Turnbull enjoyed very much even if he wasn't allowed to write back]. This was not popular with some senior Mounties [specifically, the ones that sent Fraser back to Chicago as 'punishment' for whistle blowing]

Turnbull has always been an indoor Mountie [which They liked even less] and that is mostly because he is allergic to horses and his better 'qualifications' are based around his educational background [university and post-grad] and being just that damned good at what he does. Since he was working in a specialised field where ranks are more based on achievement and skills than seniority and promotions boards... can you get how much They liked it when he scored Corporal in three years? Enough to get him demoted on a technicality and posted somewhere his skills were irrelevant and subsequently he'd be too 'behind the times' [training, seminars, conferences, new technology] that he can be reposted somewhere really nice .

Turnbull wants out. Obviously. Getting sent back to the Ottawa Mothership, where he has 'contacts', on the grounds of incompetence is the easiest way to do this. Ideally, he wants to pull Fraser over the border as soon as They start drawing what's left of their service pensions. Some of Turnbull's 'connections' are on good terms with Fraser's 'connections' and they could get Fraser get into a posting where he belongs.

Oh, and one of the They is now 'enjoying' a very protracted and media-visible divorce case when a major newspaper and high command both received some very interesting photographs from a mysterious third party not unconnected with the Criminal Intelligence department.
dief: Dief cry

This is why it takes me forever to write anything.

Bob Fraser's contribution to sexual education

Bob Fraser advised him to not listen to anything Mrs Fraser the elder said and work out the rest as you go along. It's a hell of a lot more fun that way.

him to not listen
never to listen

His father recommended toFraser him that he never listen to anything his grandmother had to say about the topic and he could work out the rest out as it comes along. It's a lot better that way, son.

[turning dialogue into words is difficult. Turning the dialogue in your head to words is even worse]

The edit bunny wants to re-write a thousand times until there is nothing left at all.

[rather like George Lucas]

His father recommended never listening {super strike-through}

ETA: Bob told him no to pay attention to anything his grandmother might say on the topic and just work it out once you've gone along. It's a lot more fun, he said, your mother certainly thought it was. She had a very distinctive laugh, your mother, and at the time she wouldn't stop. Sometimes things are very discouraging to a young man, but you'll pull it together, both of you.
kowalski dark

(no subject)

“You tell me, where is this going, huh?” Ray was getting demonstrative and right now he was demonstrating how to remove lumps from wallpaper by repeatedly slamming somebody into it. It might not be making an impact, but it was making Ray feel a hell of a lot better.
animal: omg llamas!

(no subject)

It's cold!

Have done some writing but my mojo decided to go today. In other news: I've been watching dosk play Mario: Odyssey on the Switch, which is definitely a spectator sport.

[i don't have that sense of orientation and co-ordination needed so I just watch and spot things]
fraser: lost boy

not entirely sure where this goes... i think I might go with just the first paragraph

When Fraser was much younger, that is approximately twenty years younger, his Grandmother had always insisted upon a large spoonful of cod liver oil to be ingested by Fraser before he was permitted to go to bed. Grandmother swore, figuratively since she abhorred certain words of Anglo-Saxon origin, that the consumption of this vile-tasting nostrum was necessary for the healthy growth and mental fortitude of young men. The logic of this was always opaque to Fraser, their diet containing many foodstuffs of marine nature and preponderance towards canned herring ; it was why an additional fish extract was necessary.

When Fraser was old enough to fully articulate his opinion regarding this illogical, and perhaps dangerously excessive, surfeit, his Grandmother re-iterated the necessity for healthy growth, mental development and moral fortitude and then added another, more novel and incomprehensible, virtue possessed by the vile liquid; it prevented masturbation, self-abuse and damage to his generative member. Fraser understood absolutely none of this and, it seemed, nor did the dictionary.
dief and donuts COYA

(no subject)

I'm feeling pleased with myself. I've just inserted a really bad pun into Booked For Murder. The boys have just arrived at the Hotel Reception and are examining security [Ray] and interviewing Receptionist [Fraser]. They will regret this piecemeal approach later.

Damien Kowalski's summer road trips are always a disaster.

ETA: 670 words I mostly like. Yay.